A Turning Point

Old habits die hard, don't they?  At what point do we discard toxic thoughts and behaviors in order to move on and live a life for and with Christ? Throughout childhood, the little tape recorder in our brain archives events and behaviors which set the tone for relationships in our future.  For example, in my young life, stability didn't exist.  Either my mother was hospitalized for mental breakdowns or my father was threatening to leave her.  This instability created a young woman with very little trust of people, especially men.  Disabling mistrust was the result of feeling abandoned. How do we erase destructive messages replaying over and over in our head with each relationship we encounter?  Through Christ.  Plain and simple.  I am proud to say about 95% of the senseless ideation rummaging around in my brain has subsided!  I have to give credit where credit is due. Jesus has set me free.  This apostolate (Direction for Our Times) is how He did it. I am a stronger, more confident and trusting Bonnie than I've ever been.  I am on the road to recovery, a turning point I never dreamed possible.


Todays Gospel (Is 7: 1-9) quote is short but impactful:


Unless your faith is firm you shall not be firm!


In Volume Two, the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus, Jesus sets us straight about holding on to old habits:

“My child, with such gratitude I view your efforts. I am here, waiting in the tabernacle to thank you and encourage you. You are trying to serve Me in your life and it is not always easy to do this. Until a complete union or surrender occurs, you continue to wrestle with the pull of the world and worldly attractions and distractions. This creates conflict in you because I am calling you in another direction. This conflict makes you feel discouraged, dear one, but you should not allow this feeling. There is not growth without some bit of discomfort. So, when you feel unsettled and you long for old habits, remember that you used those habits to console yourself in emptiness. I am now filling that emptiness for you so you do not need to rely on these things anymore. Worldly habits or addictions did not make you happy, My little soul. You felt unrest and bitterness without Me. Now, with Me, you are beginning to experience true peace, the peace which comes from heaven. This is a sign that your soul is directing the movement and action of your body, which is how man is intended to live.”

Lay apostles, it is flat out challenging to change learned behavior.  But isn't it time? Take a moment to listen to those old tapes and begin erasing mistrust, hate, envy, grudges, and every other behavior keeping you from fully living Jesus.  Let your turning point begin today.

Thank you, Lord, for assisting me in erasing bad habits ingrained since childhood. I am finally free.

God bless,

Bonnie