I do not sugar coat. Period. I refuse to enable others despite their fragile egos. I would rather tell them the truth gently than placate them with falsities.
My dad spent his last 4 months on this earth in my home. My sister and I were his caregivers until he took his last breath. Dad was a simple man with an optimistic outlook on life. About a month before his death, the three of us were sitting out on the back patio while Dad had his morning coffee and cigarette. Then came a question out of the blue. "So, will I be able to get back into my own apartment again?" My sister responded with something like, "Well, maybe Dad. We will see how things go." Now, my dad had Metastatic Malignant Melanoma and it was everywhere in his body. I kept the protest going on in my head silent as he had not asked me directly. He knew if he asked me, I would tell him the truth (I'm a nurse by education with a lot of experience in Oncology). I figured he wasn't ready for that reality. So I waited. A few days later, Dad and I were alone on the patio. And he asked me that same question. As heartbreaking as it was to tell him the truth, I did. "No Dad, you will be living here with us until the end. But I promise you will not suffer and we will be holding your hands when you take your last breath." He was silent for a few seconds, then said, "Ok. Can I get some more coffee?" As difficult as the truth is, it is so important not to live in a fantasy world, imagining it is everyone else who is getting it wrong. Truth is Jesus Christ. Truth is seeing our frailties for what they are . . . we are all imperfect beings. Today, stop justifying your attitude to make yourself feel better or more important. Live the Truth. Live Jesus Christ.
In today's Gospel (Luke 7:31-35), the ill will is so evident it needs no proof:
Jesus said to the crowds:
"To what shall I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are like children who sit in the marketplace and call to one another,
'We played the flute for you, but you did not dance. We sang a dirge, but you did not weep.'
For John the Baptist came neither eating food nor drinking wine, and you said, 'He is possessed by a demon.' The Son of Man came eating and drinking and you said, 'Look, he is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.' But wisdom is vindicated by all her children."
In Anne a lay apostle's book Suspended in Mystery, she ties in how attitudes, with the Truth, can be corrected:
"Mary would have detected pride or arrogance without effort. She would have helped to gently shape the disposition of those early fathers so that they never lost sight of the Spirit of her son, who was all love. Jesus did not reject sinners. He rejected sin. Mary, as the mother of all people, would have made certain that the distinction remained pronounced, so as to fully conflict with and contradict the attitudes of the Pharisees who so hated her son and whom she, herself, felt puzzled by."
Lay apostles, are you justifying behaviors because it is too difficult to acknowledge the truth? The younger version of myself would justify away any negative truths. My woundedness couldn't take any criticism. Now I live my life knowing any false arrows thrown my way are not my problem but the "archer's" problem.
Thank you, Lord, for all the wisdom You send me through Your Gospels, Anne, and all the Volumes/books. My life is incredibly peaceful when I let You control outcomes.
God bless,
Bonnie
My dad spent his last 4 months on this earth in my home. My sister and I were his caregivers until he took his last breath. Dad was a simple man with an optimistic outlook on life. About a month before his death, the three of us were sitting out on the back patio while Dad had his morning coffee and cigarette. Then came a question out of the blue. "So, will I be able to get back into my own apartment again?" My sister responded with something like, "Well, maybe Dad. We will see how things go." Now, my dad had Metastatic Malignant Melanoma and it was everywhere in his body. I kept the protest going on in my head silent as he had not asked me directly. He knew if he asked me, I would tell him the truth (I'm a nurse by education with a lot of experience in Oncology). I figured he wasn't ready for that reality. So I waited. A few days later, Dad and I were alone on the patio. And he asked me that same question. As heartbreaking as it was to tell him the truth, I did. "No Dad, you will be living here with us until the end. But I promise you will not suffer and we will be holding your hands when you take your last breath." He was silent for a few seconds, then said, "Ok. Can I get some more coffee?" As difficult as the truth is, it is so important not to live in a fantasy world, imagining it is everyone else who is getting it wrong. Truth is Jesus Christ. Truth is seeing our frailties for what they are . . . we are all imperfect beings. Today, stop justifying your attitude to make yourself feel better or more important. Live the Truth. Live Jesus Christ.
In today's Gospel (Luke 7:31-35), the ill will is so evident it needs no proof:
Jesus said to the crowds:
"To what shall I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are like children who sit in the marketplace and call to one another,
'We played the flute for you, but you did not dance. We sang a dirge, but you did not weep.'
For John the Baptist came neither eating food nor drinking wine, and you said, 'He is possessed by a demon.' The Son of Man came eating and drinking and you said, 'Look, he is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.' But wisdom is vindicated by all her children."
In Anne a lay apostle's book Suspended in Mystery, she ties in how attitudes, with the Truth, can be corrected:
"Mary would have detected pride or arrogance without effort. She would have helped to gently shape the disposition of those early fathers so that they never lost sight of the Spirit of her son, who was all love. Jesus did not reject sinners. He rejected sin. Mary, as the mother of all people, would have made certain that the distinction remained pronounced, so as to fully conflict with and contradict the attitudes of the Pharisees who so hated her son and whom she, herself, felt puzzled by."
Lay apostles, are you justifying behaviors because it is too difficult to acknowledge the truth? The younger version of myself would justify away any negative truths. My woundedness couldn't take any criticism. Now I live my life knowing any false arrows thrown my way are not my problem but the "archer's" problem.
Thank you, Lord, for all the wisdom You send me through Your Gospels, Anne, and all the Volumes/books. My life is incredibly peaceful when I let You control outcomes.
God bless,
Bonnie
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