I was blessed to care for both parents at end-of-life with one of my sisters by my side through it all (Thanks, sis! Love you tons!). It was heartbreaking, exhausting, stressful, grace-filled, joyful, with bits of comedic breaks along the way. We laughed, cried, fought (only a few times!), quickly jumped into action when needed, and, prayed A LOT. There were so many moments I cherish in those last months with my parents who died 13 months apart. I'll never forget when my dad asked me if he was ever going home to his own apartment again to which I replied truthfully . . . no. It was a defining moment in his journey toward heaven. His reply? "Ok. Can I get another cup of coffee?" When we are faced with the fact our time on earth is coming to an end, the fear of the unknown takes over, just as it does with Jesus' disciples in today's Gospel (Matthew 8:23-27). Ultimately, Jesus is asking us to trust Him, always. Trust in Him brings great calm:
As Jesus got into a boat, his disciples followed him. Suddenly a violent storm came up on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by waves; but he was asleep. They came and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We are perishing!” He said to them, “Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?” Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was great calm. The men were amazed and said, “What sort of man is this, whom even the winds and the sea obey?”
As Jesus got into a boat, his disciples followed him. Suddenly a violent storm came up on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by waves; but he was asleep. They came and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We are perishing!” He said to them, “Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?” Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was great calm. The men were amazed and said, “What sort of man is this, whom even the winds and the sea obey?”
In Anne a lay apostle's book Whispers From the Cross, Jesus guides us to finding calm in Him:
"So much is clear to you, dear apostle. You know that I am calling you. You know that I urge you to more complete abandonment. I ask for trust that is a decision made by you and lived by you. Decide that you will abandon yourself to My work in each day. Decide that you will trust Me to provide you with all that you need. Ask Me what I need from you and do that instead of doing what you would like to do. Sit in silence with Me so that I can calm you and encourage you. Dear apostle, I want you to be focused on Me and on My presence in your work. I want you to look on yesterday as practice and today as the real test. I know that you feel challenged in trust but you are well able to be at peace with Me. You have trusted Me successfully in the past and that is how we know that you can serve in trust today. Only in complete trust will you be able to rise to the challenges that are in your future. If I did not need this from you, I would not ask it of you. I have so much to teach you about holiness and you will learn quickly if you proceed as I am asking. I send abundant graces to you in your work. See that I am sincere in My promise to be with you in everything."
Lay apostles, life is a roller coaster. Ups and downs, twists and turns are part of every life experience. Cling tightly to Christ . . . He will keep you calm and secure.
Thank you, Lord, for this roller coaster ride called life! I may have to close my eyes once in a while, but I am calm knowing You have control.
God bless,
Bonnie
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