Earthly Pride

"If you are discouraged it is a sign of pride, because it shows you trust in your own powers. Never bother about other people's opinions. Be humble and you will never be disturbed."  Mother Theresa

We all love to talk about the accomplishments of our children (and grandchildren!). It's a natural instinct. When I became a registered nurse, you would think, according to my mom, I just won the Nobel Prize! She would tell everyone and anyone . . . to the point I would beg her to stop. It was as if going on and on about my accomplishment made her feel more important, that she had value. Earthly pride . . . the need to feel superior . . . important. Pride is exactly the opposite of what Christ asks of us. Give Him all the glory, be humble. A life lived for Him is a life full of graces and blessings. 

Todays Gospel (John 5:31-47) has a pretty powerful message . . . believe what Scriptures say:

Jesus said to the Jews:  “If I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is not true. But there is another who testifies on my behalf, and I know that the testimony he gives on my behalf is true. You sent emissaries to John, and he testified to the truth. I do not accept human testimony, but I say this so that you may be saved. He was a burning and shining lamp, and for a while you were content to rejoice in his light. But I have testimony greater than John’s. The works that the Father gave me to accomplish, these works that I perform testify on my behalf that the Father has sent me. Moreover, the Father who sent me has testified on my behalf. But you have never heard his voice nor seen his form, and you do not have his word remaining in you, because you do not believe in the one whom he has sent. You search the Scriptures, because you think you have eternal life through them; even they testify on my behalf. But you do not want to come to me to have life.

“I do not accept human praise; moreover, I know that you do not have the love of God in you.  I came in the name of my Father, but you do not accept me; yet if another comes in his own name, you will accept him. How can you believe, when you accept praise from one another and do not seek the praise that comes from the only God? Do not think that I will accuse you before the Father: the one who will accuse you is Moses, in whom you have placed your hope. For if you had believed Moses, you would have believed me because he wrote about me.  But if you do not believe his writings, how will you believe my words?”

In the booklet Heaven Speaks to Those Who Do Not Know Jesus, Our Lord promises love and protection . . . all we have to do is accept Him:

"My friend, this is between you and Me. By “this” I refer to both this conversation and your ultimate decision of whether to accept Me or reject Me. When you are asked to make an important decision on earth, you consider your options. You take time and weigh both sides. Perhaps you waver between one course and another. I want you to consider both sides of this decision. If you accept Me, you will have entry into the most loving and secure family of all. If you accept Me, you will have security for the rest of your life in that I will lay out the course in front of you, guiding you, protecting you, and never leaving you. If you accept Me, you will come to heaven in triumph, bringing with you the great benefits that your cooperation secured for your family. You will walk in truth and in calm. Your life on earth will not suddenly become easy, but it will be filled with God’s peace and God’s grace. If you reject Me, you will continue on, vulnerable to the deceit of My enemy. You will delude yourself at times, thinking that you are wise. Perhaps you will feel superior to many of your brothers and sisters, but I tell you today, in all of My truth, that the most humble one in heaven holds all of God’s mysteries in his soul. You will not be privy to these mystical realities if you reject Me. How could you be if you did not want to be? I conclude with one of the greatest truth of all and that is that I do not force My children to choose Me. I do not force humanity to work for heaven. If I did, we would not have a family, but a master and his slaves. No. This is not for Me and this is not for you. The heavenly Kingdom would not be the heavenly Kingdom if it were not filled with willing and beloved children. Everyone in heaven works for each other in great joy. Everyone in heaven works for our family members on earth in great hope. As you read these words, there is great hope in heaven that you will choose Me, Jesus Christ, and embark upon the journey to truth. It is here for you. I have truth and I have a course laid out for you that will bring you to this destination. I love you. I will take care of you. Choose Me and I will begin to reveal Myself to you. You will know peace, My friend."

Lay apostles, do you find yourself dropping names? Going on and on about your child's accomplishments? Feeling superior as the Pharisees demonstrate in Scripture? Or, are you on the receiving end of some who brag a little too much? Next time you feel yourself dominating a conversation with your successes or your child's successes, stop and give the other person a chance to share. Focus on listening rather than talking. Eradicate pride in exchange for humility. 

Thank you, Lord, for teaching me to listen more and talk less . . . not an easy task for this Italian!

God bless,

Bonnie

Chaos Free

“It’s a lack of clarity that creates chaos and frustration. Those emotions are poison to any living goal.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free. 

My life today, I am happy to say, is chaos free. Not that situations don't pop up where I could be dragged into my old way of thinking and reacting. Maybe it's my age, maybe it's having a partner who desires a "chaoticless" life, too. If only I knew then what I know now, right? Chaos is a choice. You can either choose to participate or let the whirling dervishes whirl. I choose to stay focused on what Jesus is asking of me. What do you choose today?

In todays Gospel (John 5: 17-30), Our Savior defines how we are saved:

Jesus answered the Jews:  “My Father is at work until now, so I am at work.” For this reason they tried all the more to kill him, because he not only broke the sabbath but he also called God his own father, making himself equal to God.

Jesus answered and said to them, “Amen, amen, I say to you, the Son cannot do anything on his own, but only what he sees the Father doing; for what he does, the Son will do also. For the Father loves the Son and shows him everything that he himself does, and he will show him greater works than these, so that you may be amazed. For just as the Father raises the dead and gives life, so also does the Son give life to whomever he wishes. Nor does the Father judge anyone, but he has given all judgment to the Son, so that all may honor the Son just as they honor the Father. Whoever does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him. Amen, amen, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes in the one who sent me has eternal life and will not come to condemnation, but has passed from death to life. Amen, amen, I say to you, the hour is coming and is now here when the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God, and those who hear will live. For just as the Father has life in himself, so also he gave to the Son the possession of life in himself. And he gave him power to exercise judgment, because he is the Son of Man. Do not be amazed at this, because the hour is coming in which all who are in the tombs will hear his voice and will come out, those who have done good deeds to the resurrection of life, but those who have done wicked deeds to the resurrection of condemnation.

“I cannot do anything on my own; I judge as I hear, and my judgment is just, because I do not seek my own will but the will of the one who sent me.”

In Anne a lay apostle's book The Mist of Mercy, she is very clear in directing us to live our lives in service to Christ:

"Some souls understand that Jesus exists. They believe in God. They do not live this belief, however, and they do not make decisions based on their belief. They do not serve. Some souls understand that Jesus exists. They believe in God. They make many decisions based on this belief and live good lives. They serve partially. Some souls understand that Jesus exists. They believe in God. They live this belief and make most or all of their decisions based on this belief. These souls are saints. They serve in near totality. It is a challenge for a person to conform his life to something he has not seen but therein lay the merit of our earthly service. We do not see this heavenly Kingdom. We do not see the saints who have gone before us. We cannot touch the stones or trees or water in heaven. We are, however, given great grace in our souls with which to understand and believe the truths of God. The Sacraments provide treasures of grace to strengthen our understanding of God. Souls who live for the world deny these truths. They do not wish to believe because they do not wish to serve God. They desire their own will. When these souls die, they have to come to terms with the fact that they knew God existed and chose against Him on some occasions. They have to admit and acknowledge that they knew of God’s existence because this is the land of truth and there is no bantering or word play. The truth is plain to see here. On earth souls try to tie each other up in knots with clever arguments designed to distract from the truth. This will not work in the heavenly Kingdom. We will be able to relax there and there will be no need to be clever in that respect. This will be a relief because one gets tired of having to constantly expose the enemy’s distortions and traps. I find that some souls try to put me in a paper bag with their words and I am always trying to fight my way out. I am at peace about this, as every soul should be. When we are being challenged and we lack the words, we must simply say nothing. Ultimately, it is God’s fight, not ours. He always wins in the end."

Lay apostles, when chaos erupts, do you? Are you the creator of chaos? Whatever your answer is, make yourself small and ask Jesus to calm your soul before you speak or act. Choose to detach from any situation causing you unrest. Restore calm and unity to the best of your ability. As Anne says above, "Ultimately, it is God's fight, not ours. He always wins in the end." 

Thank you, Lord, for the peace You have given my soul. Continue to help me to stay out of chaos and focused on You!

God bless,

Bonnie

Find Joy in Persecution

If I would have seen an article with the above title 10 years ago, I would have thought the writer was a little on the cuckoo side. Who wants to be persecuted . . . and be happy about it? It's really hard not to take things personally when others don't approve of me or what I do; when they laugh at my best attempts to be holier. Now, reread my last sentence. Remind you of anyone? Yes! Our Lord and Savior experienced the EXACT SAME THING when on this earth. Yet He chose to continue on with His mission . . . to save you and me. Think about the Sorrowful Mysteries and you will see the beauty of His sacrifice. He had us in mind the entire time, enduring persecution at its worst . . . death on the cross. It's easier to find joy in persecution when I remember His suffering . . . and I want so much to give Him comfort and thanks for what He did for me. It's the least I can do. 

Todays Gospel (John 5:1-16) is a prime example Jesus teaches us to stay focused on our mission, not the persecution:

There was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. Now there is in Jerusalem at the Sheep Gate a pool called in Hebrew Bethesda, with five porticoes. In these lay a large number of ill, blind, lame, and crippled. One man was there who had been ill for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had been ill for a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to be well?” The sick man answered him, “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; while I am on my way, someone else gets down there before me.” Jesus said to him, “Rise, take up your mat, and walk.” Immediately the man became well, took up his mat, and walked.

Now that day was a sabbath. So the Jews said to the man who was cured, “It is the sabbath, and it is not lawful for you to carry your mat.” He answered them,  “The man who made me well told me, ‘Take up your mat and walk.’” They asked him, “Who is the man who told you, ‘Take it up and walk’?” The man who was healed did not know who it was, for Jesus had slipped away, since there was a crowd there. After this Jesus found him in the temple area and said to him, “Look, you are well; do not sin any more, so that nothing worse may happen to you.” The man went and told the Jews that Jesus was the one who had made him well. Therefore, the Jews began to persecute Jesus because he did this on a sabbath.

In Anne a lay apostle's book Whispers From the Cross, she thoroughly explains why we must get past our humanity and seeing everything through the eyes of Christ:

"The head of Jesus is hanging down on the cross. He has given everything. He is finished. The journey has been successfully traversed. Jesus has accepted betrayal and returned love. “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” Jesus allows compassion to react, not anger. May He give us all such richness in our service and may we each accept the graces to respond to betrayal as He did. So it might be worthy of consideration that humanity should be suspicious of his first response until each person is well-trained in putting on the mind of Christ. Our first response will usually be generated by our humanity or the instinct of self. We must become adept at overriding this first response and inserting, instead, a second and hopefully more worthy response. We are apostles. We are called to be messengers, envoys. We represent Jesus, not our weak humanity. When we feel betrayed, we are never in a better position to bring Christ to the world. As representatives of Jesus, we are watched, be assured. Others will want to see how we are going to act in conditions of duress. Think of Scripture. The apostles rejoiced at persecution. Do we rejoice at persecution? Much of this has to do with the old, faithful spiritual goal which is trust in God. We can find ourselves objecting strenuously saying, “I’m concerned about God’s plan being protected.” As a wise man once told me, “The Lord can look after Himself.” In other words, God is all powerful and He will not allow any attack, however grave, to interfere with His plan. If we are attacked to a degree that heaven’s plan suffers, then it is not our affair. Often it will be our pride that is suffering, if truth be told."

Lay apostles, the world is full of good people. Sometimes we just have to search them out. And, there are always going to be the nay-sayers, ready to make you as miserable as they are. See each act of persecution as an opportunity to put a smile on our Savior's beautiful face. I try my hardest to be the light, and instead of focusing on the negative, I do my best to make Him happy. It's all that matters!

Thank you, Lord, for the ability to find beauty in ugly. It has taken me awhile to stop internalizing what others say and do. But thank you, most of all, for the joy I now feel when I overcome it!

God bless,

Bonnie

Anne's First Thursday Talk

March 2016 First Thursday Talk for prayer groups and personal reflection. Available in both video and text (below).

 

 

(click photo to play video)

Good evening. We are walking together steadily through Lent. And like Jesus, we experience temptations. We can certainly be tempted to lose sight of the reasons why we take on Lenten offerings of purification or prayer. But it is good that we remind ourselves that there is a divide to be crossed between our human instincts and our higher instincts.

What is important? Why do penance? Why commit to more disciplined prayer? What might be God’s goals in drawing us into periods where we try to put some order on the demands of our body or the distractions of our soul? Well, anyone listening has, at some point, probably had a moment when he or she experienced God’s love, God’s presence. Maybe we felt certainty that we were loved. Maybe we had an experience of watching someone pray and knowing, really knowing that God was present. And then we wanted that, too, in a longing to do better and to be at peace. We were, in some way, inspired. Maybe this happened on a pilgrimage, or in prayer or simply as we walked down a street or maybe it was in a dream, what psychology would call a BIG dream, that we remember and that comes back to us.

What is relevant about these moments of grace? Well, we are humble at those moments. We feel an overall feeling that there is a plan, we are part of it and even while we need to strive for greater holiness, always, we are somehow fit to contribute and indeed, we are asked to contribute. At the lowest points of people’s lives, they have to be reminded by us, their brothers and sisters, that they are important and that their contribution is needed. But generally, after an experience of God, we feel calm and energized. We feel like everything will probably be just fine.

I remember a mother telling me this story. She was single and had adopted two daughters on her own. She knew that she had her hands full but somewhere in her, she wondered if she should adopt one more child. Now everyone would say to her, you can’t. It’s too much. Forget about it. And so she went on. But one night she had a dream. And in the dream, she saw Our Lady holding a little boy. And Our Lady said to her in the dream, you do not have to do this. But he is here for you if you want to take him.

Well, that was it. From that moment this woman knew she had a son. She simply had to find him. And so she looked in China, where she had adopted her two daughters. The only boys up for adoption had disabilities, which was fine. And one day, she found a picture of a little boy and in her heart, she instantly recognized him. She had certainty. And when she showed the picture to another family member, who had advised her not to adopt another child, that family member said, ‘Go. Get him fast. He’s part of our family’. And so she did. And when the process was difficult she remembered that dream and it sustained her. And periodically she would think of it, and the wonder and awe she first felt would flood back to her. And she knew that she was not alone and that she was acting in union with God and for God.

Sometimes, when we need something badly, just at the right time, it comes. There is the saying which we at the lay apostolate would agree with that we do not believe in miracles, we rely on them. This is true for us. God makes himself known regularly. But I think God does this for all of us. And I think we need to better recognize and celebrate these moments as gifts. God is guiding us and He could only love us, regardless of our condition. So we are not trying to prove anything to God through Lenten practices. We are trying to cross the divide from no self-awareness to greater self-awareness.

When we try to get our bodies in line, and our bodies object, either through fasting or rising early or what have you….we become aware of attachments. And when we try to pray more often or in a more disciplined manner, we become aware of how disconnected we can be from God’s reassurance, peace and direction.

And when we try to forgive and it is difficult, we become aware of how badly hurt we were or still are. And so, the more we learn about ourselves in God’s light, the more we know where our difficulties are and where our strengths lie. This is good for us and God wants us to grow. And if we never investigate or challenge our ways of being or thinking, we can be prone to drifting. And we can lose altitude on the mountain of holiness. We can slip down, and backwards and of course, land badly. Because we all know, there is an easy way and a hard way.

And so maybe lent is about submitting ourselves to a little bit of scrutiny in God’s light, partially by challenging our habits and testing our prayer lives. And maybe, just maybe, we can look back at some of our difficulties in life and recognize that in those difficulties we found growth that we did not think possible and strength that we never knew we had. And so, if that is true, then it must be true that any difficulties we have now, our current struggles, also hold growth opportunities and God will again give us all of the strength that we need. Because we weren’t built to be overwhelmed by life. We were built to transform through the circumstances we have to negotiate. We have what it takes to do what God needs us to do. If we want to add 10 more things to our day, over and above what God needs from us, well, then, we might find ourselves in trouble, overwhelmed. The temptation to be overwhelmed through a lack of balance in life is real. But balance is a movable target and while it might not be possible to find balance in each day, it can be sought in each week, month and year.

Perhaps the measure of our condition could be found in our ability to experience wonder and awe and to ponder beauty and love. What do we find beautiful? What makes us pause and simply admire a thing or marvel? Where do we recognize God’s hand most often? Is it music? Art work? An ocean? A sky? A flower? A baby’s face or the face of an older person? What is it? Because, my friends, we should seek it out and revel in it. We should celebrate it in our memories, even. We should regularly sit quietly and recall moments of wonder and re-experience them in our minds.

We can all be prone to cynicism or fatalism and when this happens to us, we need to experience more wonder and awe. We need to seek it out. So let us ask ourselves this question.  What fills me with amazement? What lifts my thoughts to endless possibilities or causes me to stop in our tracks? What makes me laugh out loud in joy?

For some, it is stars. Others love animals or nature. Some people find it in science or in really lovely writing. God, I believe, can be glimpsed in these ways. And sometimes people who do not believe in God are mystified at belief. But I see it this way. If I were to say to you, this room is full of this, you cannot see it, but it’s keeping us all alive and without it we will all die. A person who has never been taught science would discount my sentence out of hand and say, there’s nothing in this room other than what I can see’. A person who has been taught science would think….’that’s obvious. She is talking about oxygen.’

We want to experience God as clearly as possible. We want to be open to the opportunities for wonder and awe that surround us. Our little human being is meant to live in harmony with the reality of our spirituality. We are capable of great things spiritually. But we have to want them, decide for them and go after them.

Think about a young person who tells you they want to be a doctor. This person never goes to class, drinks a lot, spends their college money foolishly and thinks that most doctors are really frauds who do not care about their patients. Would you be entirely convinced that this person would become a doctor in the future? No. And no matter what this person says, we would really query the desire. This person is not behaving like he wants to be a doctor.

In the same way, we are supposed to be heading for sainthood. Why should we want to become saints? Well, because a moment could come and we would not want to be caught unprepared. .Think about it. Jesus lived his life for His Father. And at the final moment of testing, what he did was quite logical. He proceeded. He took the next step into the Father’s will. He was prepared for the acceptance of his death by the daily offerings of his life. He was disciplined in putting the Father first and submitting to death for the sake of others. That’s not a little thing. But we are all called to do it in some fashion, each day. And when the really big trials come? Will we be fit for them, as Jesus was?

It depends. Are we attached to the opinions of others? or have we engaged with injustice and used it to become detached? Are we able to tell our bodies no. that we cannot just take everything they want? or do we justify bad habits and refuse to forgive, heal and grow? Do we live our faith, based on our feelings? Meaning, I don’t feel like going to mass or I don’t feel like going to confession? Do we gossip, negatively scrutinize ourselves and others or judge people whom we know little about? Do we keep company with people going in the opposite direction and fool ourselves into thinking it doesn’t affect us? Do we lack hope, for ourselves, others and the world? If these things describe us….should we be entirely convinced that we are headed in the most direct way for sainthood?

And that, my friends, is why we need Lent. To gently correct ourselves where we need correcting. To identify negative habits and patterns of thinking and behaving that are not helpful. But more importantly, to take on habits that are helpful and life giving. In Lent, we should practice accepting little challenges and trying to slip right back into wonder and awe as a way to heal on the spot. We can move through life with such lightness if we choose to. We can carry nothing into the next moments. In some kitchens there are signs that say, clean as you go. I certainly agree! And in life we should think of a sign that says grow as you go. And then we will use each situation as practice for even greater challenges.

Through Lent, let us each come to see more of the love of God and understand where we, too, can be selfless and courageous and willing to die to self for each other, like Jesus did for each one of us.

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Hardening of the Attitudes

"The world's most deadly disease is 'hardening of the attitudes." Zig Ziglar 

Last year I was speaking with a local consecrated individual regarding some frustrations I was experiencing within our local diocese. This person's frame of mind was, "It may not be right, but this is just the way it is. You have to accept this is never going to happen." My response? "Well, I believe God can do anything. Don't you?" Their response? A quiet head shake in agreement. This Lent I have been praying hard for patience. But when it comes to "hardening of the attitudes," I still find myself to be very impatient . . . and I'm ok with it in this case. Because I believe Jesus is calling us to act with a sense of urgency in reclaiming His Church here on earth. I believe everything Jesus says in the Bible and in the Volumes. He is with me through every frustration, every joy, every pain. I am willing to go through anything for Him. God has a plan . . . 

In todays Gospel (John 4:43-54), I can imagine Jesus thinking . . . another sign? Really?

At that time Jesus left [Samaria] for Galilee. For Jesus himself testified that a prophet has no honor in his native place. When he came into Galilee, the Galileans welcomed him since they had seen all he had done in Jerusalem at the feast; for they themselves had gone to the feast.

Then he returned to Cana in Galilee, where he had made the water wine. Now there was a royal official whose son was ill in Capernaum. When he heard that Jesus had arrived in Galilee from Judea, he went to him and asked him to come down and heal his son, who was near death. Jesus said to him, “Unless you people see signs and wonders, you will not believe.” The royal official said to him, “Sir, come down before my child dies.” Jesus said to him, “You may go; your son will live.” The man believed what Jesus said to him and left. While the man was on his way back, his slaves met him and told him that his boy would live. He asked them when he began to recover. They told him, “The fever left him yesterday, about one in the afternoon.” The father realized that just at that time Jesus had said to him, “Your son will live,” and he and his whole household came to believe. Now this was the second sign Jesus did when he came to Galilee from Judea.

In Volume Five, Jesus puts it all together very clearly for me:

"Now I wish to tell you about something that concerns Me. There are many who claim to be My followers. Some follow My lead, but others do not. They follow their own will, but do so behind a guise of obedience. The reason this obedience is a guise and not a genuine obedience is because they have rejected My Church in that they feel they have a greater wisdom than the soul whom I chose to represent Me. Children of God, you are accountable. Do you think that I made a mistake when I asked this current man to be My earthly Vicar? Well then you must take that up with Me upon your entry into My Kingdom. That will be the appropriate time to discuss what you may feel are the mistakes I have made. Until that time, I am calling on you to be respectful, obedient, and supportive of this man, your Pope. Priests, in particular, are not serving Me when they lead others to doubt the Holy Father. Souls feel that priests have a greater wisdom than others, and if a priest is following My voice, this is usually true. But priests who are following My voice are not behaving in a disobedient and disrespectful manner toward the leader of My Church, even if they do not always agree with how this man is leading. The true spirit of God does not manifest in cynicism, dear souls, so when you see cynicism, you may be assured that I am not present and I am not directing the conversation. This will increase in your world. I do not like to tell you this but I must. You must be alert always for these signs. I would like you to respond with quiet firmness in the face of cynicism. When souls criticize My Church and its leaders, you must direct them to Me. They should never spread disunity among My followers."

Lay apostles, do you believe God has limitations? Or, is your God a God of limitless possibilities? God is still as powerful as the day He parted the Red Sea or the day He rose from the dead. It may be time to have a spiritual checkup . . . if you find you have hardening of the attitudes, go to Jesus for the cure!

Thank you, Lord, for giving me gumption to overcome obstacles thrown in my way by Your enemy. 

God bless,

Bonnie

Seeing Christ In Me

A hug when I am feeling defeated. Acceptance and patience when I am not in the best of moods.  Sometimes I am just off, or tired, or frustrated. My husband is one of the kindest men I know . . . have ever known. I see Christ in his eyes when I am not feeling my most lovable. We are all capable of shining the Light of Christ in our words and actions. Do others see Christ in me?  Does my husband? I pray the answer to my question is YES! I am imperfect and will be a work in progress until the day He calls me home. Some will never see the good when evil tries to convince otherwise. All I can do is continue to try . . . responding with love when hurt; patience when misunderstood; listening instead of speaking. Not a easy task when attempting it alone. With Jesus front and center in my eyes, I can accomplish anything He asks of me!

Todays Gospel (John 9:1, 6-9, 13-17, 34-38) is more than just a blind man seeing . . . it about opening his eyes and seeing the Son of Man:

As Jesus passed by he saw a man blind from birth. He spat on the ground and made clay with the saliva, and smeared the clay on his eyes, and said to him, 

“Go wash in the Pool of Siloam” — which means Sent —. So he went and washed, and came back able to see.

His neighbors and those who had seen him earlier as a beggar said,  “Isn’t this the one who used to sit and beg?” Some said, “It is,” but others said, “No, he just looks like him.” He said, “I am.”

They brought the one who was once blind to the Pharisees. Now Jesus had made clay and opened his eyes on a sabbath. So then the Pharisees also asked him how he was able to see. He said to them, “He put clay on my eyes, and I washed, and now I can see.” So some of the Pharisees said, “This man is not from God, because he does not keep the sabbath.” But others said, “How can a sinful man do such signs?” And there was a division among them. So they said to the blind man again, “What do you have to say about him, since he opened your eyes?” He said, “He is a prophet.”

They answered and said to him, “You were born totally in sin, and are you trying to teach us?” Then they threw him out.

When Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, he found him and said, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?” He answered and said, “Who is he, sir, that I may believe in him?” Jesus said to him, “You have seen him, and the one speaking with you is he.” He said, “I do believe, Lord,” and he worshiped him.

In Volume One, Jesus asks us to be His Representatives on earth:

“I want My love to fill this world. I want to begin a worldwide endeavor which begins with each of you. Love each person with whom I place you today. The smaller, more powerless, and more damaged they are, the more I want them to see Christ shining out at them from YOUR eyes. Only in this way will I be put back in My rightful place. Be warned. The evil one, looking at you from the eyes of some of your brothers and sisters, will identify Me within you. You will be the object of derision at times. How those opportunities delighted My saints. Practice that attitude and these same opportunities will delight you also. This is My promise to you, dearest ones. Walk with Me, live with Me, and you will no longer feel any stings this world attempts to inflict upon you. They will bounce from you like so many pointless arrows. Are you listening, My children? I want this from you. Do not disappoint Me and all joy will be yours. Your Jesus loves you and speaks directly to your hearts at this time. Listen for Me. I am there, with you.” 

Lay apostles, do you look for Christ in others? In yourself? If you aren’t, begin now. Be His Eyes, His Heart and His Love on earth. He is waiting to reward you in eternity!

Thank you, Lord, for opening my eyes and ears to live Your messages on a daily basis. 

God bless,

Bonnie

No Finger Pointing Allowed

“She did it!” 

“No, she did it!”

And then it began . . . my three little girls trying to play Barbies together usually turned into a teachable moment; a lesson in sharing (albeit after many accusations and protruding tongues!). 

How easy it is to condemn another when things aren't going exactly as you planned or desired. Now, little girls playing Barbies are far from being Pharisees. But as we mature and become adults, we need to learn to point the finger inward, to see our part in the disunity. Where are we getting it wrong? Instead of blaming when wronged, pray for clarity. Speak as Jesus speaks, not as a Pharisee speaks. Proclaiming we have done all the work we need to do to change/grow only proves we have a long way to go. Listen to yourself when accusing another of needing more “fixing.” To live as Christ wants us to live, no finger pointing allowed. 

In todays Gospel (Luke 18:9-14), I know who I want to be on judgement day:

Jesus addressed this parable to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else. “Two people went up to the temple area to pray; one was a Pharisee and the other was a tax collector. The Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself, ‘O God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of humanity — greedy, dishonest, adulterous — or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.’ But the tax collector stood off at a distance and would not even raise his eyes to heaven but beat his breast and prayed, ‘O God, be merciful to me a sinner.’ I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

In Anne a lay apostle’s book Climbing the Mountain, she gives us a prime example of achieving unity with Jesus and our brothers and sisters on earth:

“The lay apostle must be gentle in his service to others. We understand that the first will be last and the last will be first in that those who push themselves forward for special treatment are necessarily pushing others behind them. This is not the Christian way, of course. If my reader will pardon my attempt to extend this out in a concrete way, I will pursue this thought. We accept that we are to be the servants of others. In the simplest terms, we opt to be the one who is in the kitchen preparing the food and then cleaning up after the feast. This is good and this is the idea. Well done if we are here. 

But let’s look not only at the service but also at the spirit of the service. We opt to cook and clean and do so in union with Christ, and in great love and prayer for the others who are not serving but enjoying the party. Well done again and even better if we are here. Conversely, cooking and cleaning resentfully is not the idea. If we are here, we must ask Jesus to fill us with love for those we serve. Let’s move a bit further. We opt to cook and clean in union with Jesus, in prayerful petitioning for the ones enjoying the party. Those souls are ridiculing and mocking us for the very service we perform. They show us that they feel superior to us and even treat us with pitying disrespect. Because our service shines a light on their non- service and exposes them, they strike out at us in their guilt. They deliberately misunderstand our motives, which wounds us terribly. We take this and offer it to Jesus in union with His Passion for these very souls and beg Him for conversion graces and clarity for them. We feel the stings but soldier on, overcoming any urges to retaliate by showing them that we are not fools to be taken advantage of, but willing victims for heaven. We correctly see these urges as temptations to be overcome. This is very good and if we are not here, we must be at peace, as we will surely arrive at this destination if we have the desire. We cannot discuss service without remarking on the self-imposed or self-assigned martyrdom of many apostles on the hill. Please, let us not be martyrs unless we are quite certain that Jesus is in fact requesting this of us. We must not take our service and rebuke others with it. This defeats two purposes, which are the advancement of our own holiness and the example and love we give to others. Yes, we are all guilty of self-inflicted and enjoyable martyrdom at some time and that is why we must look closely and identify this as a trap that can turn us into a Pharisee. Some will cook and clean simply as a reproach to others, to hold themselves above others. They use their service as evidence of their holiness, and not contenting themselves with this mistake, they use their service further as evidence that others are unholy. Oh, dear. This is all wrong. It is far better, my fellow apostle, if we remain in the celebration and leave the service to others if our motives are those of self-promotion. As Scripture says, we will be enjoying our reward on earth, not in heaven.”

Lay apostles, where is your finger pointing today? At a loved one, a friend, a co-worker? If so, turn it around and see where you can improve! We can only control ourselves. When I finally came to this realization, my world became a much more peaceful place to live!

Thank you, Lord, for your re-direction when I am finger pointing. Please continue to teach me how to live as You lived on earth!

God bless,

Bonnie

Are You Loving God With All Your Heart?

Loving God with all my heart seems easy. He has blessed me with so much love in my life. But am I loving God with all my heart when I feel unloved inside? When I fail and become upset with my shortcomings? When guilt over things I cannot control cause unrest? No, I am not loving Him with all my heart because He lives within me. Within all of us. How can we love Him completely without loving ourselves? Luckily, the boxing match in my head doesn't occur very often anymore. But when it does, I pray. The evil one is sleeplessly watchful for a moment to draw us into self-doubt. Remember, even when life goes awry and the future appears dismal, focus on this day, this hour, this minute. Stop and thank God for His unending love. And, give yourself a break. 

Today's Gospel (Mark 12:28-34), one of the scribes asks Jesus which commandment is the greatest of them all. Here is His response:

Jesus replied, "The first is this: Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God is Lord alone! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. The second is this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these." The scribe said to him, "Well said, teacher. You are right in saying, He is One and there is no other than he. And to love him with all your heart,with all your understanding, with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself is worth more than all burnt offerings and sacrifices." And when Jesus saw that he answered with understanding, he said to him, "You are not far from the Kingdom of God." And no one dared to ask him any more questions.

Do you see the recurring theme in every word Jesus ever spoke? Love. Love God. Love ourselves. Love our neighbor. It's that simple. 

In Volume Three, God the Father gives us this gentle warning:

"True happiness can be found only in the union of a soul’s will to the Divine Will. When your will is united to the Divine Will, there is no conflict, no struggle. Only a very few find such union on earth. The seeking of this union is the path to holiness that you follow in your obedience to My commandments. You are making decisions. You are moving forward along the road. You are making corrections. This is the process. At times in the history of mankind, most souls on earth were moving in the general direction of heaven. At this time, most souls are languishing along the way. Many are wasting their time on earth and are not coming in this direction at all. In this way, souls are lost. As a God of mercy, I send all manner of signs and warnings. In this time, however, most of My signs are being ignored. Such is the level of distraction, that My souls no sooner see a sign and experience My call, then they allow themselves to be distracted and pulled back into the world. Children, pay attention. You must focus on Me and on your path."

What can you do today to show God you love Him by loving yourself? How about reading a page from one of the Volumes (they are free to download on the right side of this page)? Or, if you are in need of exercise, take a walk. Just do something for your own good and for your love of God.

Thank you, Lord, for pulling me up by the bootstraps on the occasions when I feel beaten down, reminding me that loving myself means loving You. 

God bless,

Bonnie 

Are You With Me or Not?

In business, you surround yourself with an A-Team . . . those who work together to achieve a mutual goal. At least you think the best of the best are assembled. The ego is a funny thing, lay apostles. It can spring itself upon the unsuspecting at any moment, throwing off the equilibrium of the team. The trick is to maintain balance and focus on the goal at hand, letting the "Whirling Dervishes" whirl while you complete the task. And, remember Jesus encountered many whose ego got in the way of seeing who He really was . . . the Son of God. Get rid of the ego and get some humility. I have to add this quote I found in Volume Seven from St. Damien:

"When man swells in his heart and feels that it is he himself who is accomplishing these things, the trouble begins. Egos are difficult friends and dreadful rulers. Keep your ego on a very short leash and understand that your merit lies in your obedience to Christ. Do not take credit for what Christ does through you. He cannot entrust great missions to you if your ego swells with each success. When your work is successful, praise God. When your work fails, praise God. When the sun shines, praise God. When the rain falls, praise God. Do you get the idea? You serve Him and He will do great things through you."

The Gospel reading (Luke 11:14-23) leaves me with this thought . . . Jesus is and was one patient, focused Man:

Jesus was driving out a demon that was mute, and when the demon had gone out, the mute man spoke and the crowded were amazed. Some of them said, “By the power of Beelzebul, the prince of demons, he drives out demons.” Others, to test him, asked him for a sign from heaven. But he knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be laid waste and house will fall against house. And if Satan is divided against himself,  how will his kingdom stand? For you say that it is by Beelzebul that I drive out demons. If I, then, drive out demons by Beelzebul, by whom do your own people drive them out? Therefore they will be your judges. But if it is by the finger of God that I drive out demons, then the Kingdom of God has come upon you. When a strong man fully armed guards his palace, his possessions are safe. But when one stronger than he attacks and overcomes him, he takes away the armor on which he relied and distributes the spoils. Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.”

In Volume Five, Jesus reiterates what we have always known as Christians . . . if you aren't choosing God, you are choosing the enemy:

"Another darkness is coming and it will be a physical darkness. You will see it with your physical sense of sight. This has been foretold and does not surprise some of you, as I, Myself, have allowed many to understand what is in the future. Be at peace, holy souls, because this darkness and time of trial is willed by Me and I can only will what is good for My children. I will take many of you to heaven at that time and your reward will be far beyond your expectation. I will compensate you for experiencing this difficult time with the greatest and most sublime of graces during the transition from this world to the next. You see that you need not be afraid. Only if you have chosen against Me and continue to rebelliously sin should you be fearful. Repent. Do so now, today."

Lay apostles, are you letting your damaged ego get in the way of your work for Jesus and this mission? If you are, stop it now. Give up control and stay humble. Let's focus on bringing the attention to Christ, not ourselves. 

Thank you, Lord, for the lessons you are teaching me about staying humble while chaos is brewing. Continue to hold my tongue when I want to react negatively!

God bless,

Bonnie

Rules For a Reason

Nothing good ever happens after midnight. This is a sentence I used with the girls when they were in high school . . . actually still use it today when necessary! My rules were quite strict and they surely let me know how unfair they were, especially when their friends had 2:00am curfews. I would hear "well, such and such's mom lets her stay out past midnight!" My comeback . . . I'm not such and such's mom! If looks could kill, I would have been gone a long time ago! Little did my girls know my rules were to create structure and safety. They were a way to protect them from untold dangers lurking in the world. My rules were out of love for them. And, to help them make good decisions when I wasn't physically around. Now my two oldest daughters have children of their own, each with two children now. After my daughter Whitney had Colton, I asked her when looking back, would she have the same rules for her children. Her answer? "I'm not letting them out of the house!" As a parent, this sounds familiar, right? Well, apply this to our Heavenly Father. He has created guidelines for our protection and safety from evil. When we don't try to live within His "rules," we tend to follow the crowd, not Him. He only wants what we want for our own children . . . to live in safety, joy, peace and loving Him.There are rules for a reason. I am doing my best not to break curfew!

Todays Gospel (Matthew 5:17-19) shows the importance of following God's guidelines:

Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill. Amen, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or the smallest part of a letter will pass from the law, until all things have taken place. Therefore, whoever breaks one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do so will be called least in the Kingdom of heaven. But whoever obeys and teaches these commandments will be called greatest in the Kingdom of heaven.”

In Anne a lay apostle's book Climbing the Mountain, she asks us to dig a little deeper and see why "rules" are important:

"We must take each moral teaching and follow it all the way down to its furthest possible consequence if ignored. Church positions then make more sense and can be viewed in truth as protective in nature, as opposed to restrictive. Love of God begins with, at least, a respect for the necessity of obedience." 

Lay apostles, we all face challenges every day. Jesus, through this apostolate, lovingly and thoroughly shows us how to live in closer communion with Him. Things won't change overnight. It takes practice and faith. I promise you, once you live His Words fully and to the best of your ability, things become easier. I find I forgive quicker; love more; listen better. I am peaceful and joyful (99% of the time!). I feel protected, fearless, and loved. This is what God has for us right now! So, stop fighting the rules and understand they are there to protect us. We are loved.

Thank you, Lord, for the ability to see Your rules for what they are, love and protection of Your children on earth. Continue to help me be obedient!

God bless,

Bonnie

March Monthly Message

We continue our cycle of monthly messages for 2016 with the message from March 1, 2008 for our prayer groups and personal reflection.

March 1, 2008

Jesus

My dear friend, you will learn so much about love in heaven. You will look back at your time on earth and you will understand that many things that occurred to you were both exercises in love and opportunities to love. There is misunderstanding about love in the world but those who follow Me, My beloved apostles, seek to master love as I mastered love, in sacrifice. It is true that love creates joy. This is true. But when we take on love, it is also at times like taking on a burden which must then be carried. We should not decide for love and then, finding that love burdensome at times, set it down and walk away from it. This is not how it is done. On the contrary, if you love as I love, you will find at times that the weight of love is heavy. I experienced this on Calvary when I carried My love for you to My death. Did I make the right decision, to pay the ultimate price for love? Of course I did. What else would I do, given the wonderful creation that is you? In the same way, I want each of My apostles to expect their love for Me to be a burden to them at times. This is normal. I want each of My apostles to expect their love for others to be a burden to them at times. This is also normal. In love, there are times when the decision to love feels light, of course, and there seems to be no burden to it at all. Rejoice in these times. In love, there are other times when the burden causes you to question your commitment. Do not be afraid of these times. This questioning is necessary for your growth. I experienced this, too. I was tempted toward an easier way. When love is tried this way and triumphs, that love becomes firmer and less likely to be disappointed later. Welcome the challenges to love, even while you decide for love. I will be with you in each situation, counselling you to humility and gentleness. View each challenge as a worthy exercise, allowed by heaven to teach you about eternity. See the opportunities to love all of those around you, particularly those whom you find it difficult to agree with at times. Please do not be alarmed when you are disappointed in love, when others fail you. This was also My experience and this will also benefit you because it will help you to learn forgiveness. I will bring you to greater holiness with each experience if you remember that I am with you and that I love you perfectly and completely. From the secure place that is My heart, you will go forward with self assurance, confident that you are cherished. This confidence will express itself in an increased ability to love those around you. Be at peace, dear apostles. My plan is such that you will learn to live like residents of heaven. All is well.

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Forgiving Made (a little) Easier

Me? Stubborn? No, it's not stubbornness, it's just strength of mind or will the way I see it. When I feel very passionate about my viewpoint, it's hard to convince me otherwise. But when it's my way or the highway, how does that allow another to have their own viewpoint? I used to see everything as black or white . . . no shades of gray in between. Either you do or you don't. With age comes wisdom (thank GOD!). I can accept opinions in conflict with my own. I may be hurt or upset at first, but the love of Christ always leads me to forgiveness. I never want to disappoint Him. And when I don't forgive, I'm hurting Him. As long as I keep Him in the middle, I can't see anything other than His way. 

In todays Gospel (Matthew 18:21-35), Peter is probably not so thrilled with Jesus' response to his question:

Peter approached Jesus and asked him, “Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times. That is why the Kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who decided to settle accounts with his servants. When he began the accounting, a debtor was brought before him who owed him a huge amount. Since he had no way of paying it back, his master ordered him to be sold, along with his wife, his children, and all his property, in payment of the debt. At that, the servant fell down, did him homage, and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back in full.’ Moved with compassion the master of that servant let him go and forgave him the loan. When that servant had left, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a much smaller amount. He seized him and started to choke him, demanding, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ Falling to his knees, his fellow servant begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he refused. Instead, he had him put in prison until he paid back the debt. Now when his fellow servants saw what had happened, they were deeply disturbed, and went to their master and reported the whole affair. His master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you your entire debt because you begged me to. Should you not have had pity on your fellow servant, as I had pity on you?’ Then in anger his master handed him over to the torturers until he should pay back the whole debt. So will my heavenly Father do to you, unless each of you forgives your brother from your heart.”

In Volume Five, Jesus asks us to accept our suffering to save souls, and that includes forgiving and asking for forgiveness:

"My faithful ones have always suffered in the world, in some way or another. If you understand that this is a time of suffering and that your suffering is redemptive in nature, you will not anguish over the fact that you are suffering. Many of My little ones make their suffering far worse than it has to be by bemoaning that they are suffering at all. Do not say to yourself, “It is unfair and unjust that I suffer.” Say to yourself always, “I will give my suffering to Jesus for the sake of the work He must do to save others.” Say to yourself, “I am sinful in nature, despite my knowledge and belief in God, so any suffering I do is just, because I have sinned.” Now little ones, I have forgiven you everything many times over. Many of you have difficulty understanding the depth of My forgiving nature and you confess the same sin, sometimes several times. You are forgiven and I forget your sins, but I ask you to suffer, not because you are sinful creatures. I ask you to suffer because many of the souls you work and live with every day may choose to go to hell if I do not have this suffering with which to obtain the great torrent of grace necessary to convert them. There is little time. Even given the fact that earthly time and heavenly time differ, there is little time."

Lay apostles, don't waste any more time in anger or bitterness. As Jesus says above, time is running out. Make the change today. And as Peter learned in the Gospel above, forgive and forgive over and over. Forgiving doesn't mean staying in a dangerous situation. It means forgive the offender and move on the best you can. We are all flawed in some way. If we weren't, we wouldn't need God to save us. Reading the above quote from Volume Five, I know He is asking us to choose our path. I choose Him.

Thank you, Lord, for Volume Five. I am more focused. You make forgiving so easy when we focus on You.

God bless,

Bonnie